How to be successful at gay dating

Nothing like telling 5, Facebook friends the location of your intimate rendezvous. Do not "friend" your date on Facebook before or after the initial meeting. If you're not a good match and dates are like new restaurants; about one in eight survive , you're both going to share that awkward moment of "Do I un-friend him or keep reading about his 'Why do I always meet losers?

Even though gay men love to label everyone, they despise being labeled. If he's 22 years old and wears glasses and weighs pounds and says "for some reason people tend to think I'm a Twink," feign surprise and say "men are so into labels.

If you're over thirty and at least four years older than your date, don't be surprised if he calls you Daddy. Take it as a compliment; do not take it as a reason to pick up the check. Unless he can juggle or tap dance in bed, "versatile bottom" means only one thing, so be prepared to take charge if things go well.

Dating For The 40+ Gay Man: 7 Steps To Success – Gay Life After com

If you're lying when you call yourself a "versatile top," either call it quits now or start working on your oral communication skills. If he insists on taking "important calls" several times during your date, don't automatically think he's blowing you off. In today's complicated world, he might be calling work, his sitter, or his ex-wife to see if she can pick up the kids. Chill out, and use the time to call your sponsor for encouragement. In the old days, it was common, and common sense, to say that, if you sleep with someone, you are also sleeping with everyone he's slept with.

Nowadays, it's common sense to remember that, if you sleep with someone who's in a Step program, you are also sleeping with everyone in his Home Group. Be prepared to be judged by all the members of the orgy. If you've met the guy online and have never met in person, and if his entire chat so far has been about how amazingly hot you are and how amazingly much he's into you and how he's quite certain you're the guy for him, he will hate you within 20 minutes of your date and you will never hear from him again.

How to Succeed in the Gay Dating Scene

If you request an explanation, he will call you a stalker and block you from any social media sites you might share. While it's nice to have a grasp of current events and knowledge of local culture, it's no longer a first-date pre-requisite. However, if you don't have an immediate answer for "Do you want to get married?

Contrary to popular belief, opinions are not like assholes, because in today's gay world, assholes are glorious and sexy and displayed prominently in photos sent to you from potential suitors. Opinions on a date are more like your lesbian best friend: We know she's important to you and we're glad you have her, but we have no idea why you'd want to introduce us to her on a first meeting and turn the evening into a serious downer.

If you do opt to discuss current events, avoid anything so controversial it will destroy potential chemistry, like Crimea, Obama's job performance, or the relevance of HBO's "Looking. Fashions change, so know the basics: No flip-flops, no shaving, and, even if it is after Memorial Day, absolutely no white underwear. If you like the guy and want things to go well, put everything out on the table: HIV status, views on monogamy, and, for Florida residents, guns. Seek and enjoy! Are you the life of the party or do you like to sit on the sidelines?

Most gay men wait for their knight in shining Tiffany to come and swoop them up from the bar stool. You look, make eye contact and even flirt a bit, but do you ever make a move?

Top 10 Secrets of Successful Gay Daters

Who doesn't want a handsome guy to come up and talk to them? Since everyone's waiting to be approached, there's no one doing the approaching; which is why it's not uncommon to go to a gay party and see everyone standing around in their own corners like at a middle school dance. Practice getting out of you comfort zone. Find a guy you like and try starting a conversation. To many gay men, the thought of doing this is terrifying, but with practice it will get more comfortable.

Find something in common. Now that you're ready to walk up to a guy, what are you going to say to him? Well, in my experience two angles work best: Breaking the ice can be easier than you may think. Find something unique about him article of clothing, jewelry, hair style , then comment on it.

Try a humorous angle. Instead of saying, "I like your hair cut" try phrasing it in a way that will make him smile or continue a conversation. A better approach might be, "You know, my stylist said only certain guys can pull off that style.

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I guess you're one of them If you get stuck, then offer to buy him a drink. This buys you time to think about something else to talk about. Once you've broken the ice, find something you guys have in common and go with it. If nothing is apparent ask him if he is interested in the things you're interested in and go from there.

Control your emotional valve. Be honest and open with your new prospect, but don't give too much too soon. Connecting with someone you like can be an overwhelming experience in its beginning stages. Take your time getting to know one another and let the details of your life and your emotions unfold naturally. Your first date might not be the time to talk about work stress or emotional issues with your father.

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Spend time in the beginning getting comfortable with each other and slowly open up. That way neither one of you are overwhelmed too early in the relationship. Play the odds. Sometimes playing the dating game is like playing a slot machine. It's attractive with its many colors and sounds, but always uncertain. Of course, there's the potential of hitting the jackpot, but unless you're extremely lucky you have to play more than a few coins to hit big.