Gay dating herpes

It has also been shown that having the herpes virus makes men more susceptible to infection with HIV. The good news is that there is less stigma attached to all STIs in the gay community, that safer sex practices are widely accepted, and that there is a range of sexual health services specifically aimed at gay men and women.

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You can find contact details for some of those services on the websites listed at the back of this booklet. Click here if you would like to get a print copy of the information booklet "The Facts: My last relationship ended for other reasons. The only reason I bring that up is to share how much of a non-issue herpes was to him. I told him I want to take it slow. To be honest, taking it slow is the best thing for me. At first, I was devastated.

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I thought my dating life was over and that no one would love me again, ever. I now know that is not true, and I can have, and deserve, a loving and healthy relationship. I have a tendency to worry and obsess, so I really have to manage that properly. I get anxiety over disclosing to someone.

Also, I still have a little shame about having an STD. But, this is my life now; so, I can either give in to the fear and hide alone — OR — I can face my fear and take a risk for falling in love. Having HSV is not the end of your dating life or the world. It is a manageable virus that is not life-threatening. I also want to help educate the gay community about HSV. Rightfully so, the gay community predominantly focuses on HIV. I understand, because that is a life-threatening virus.

But, in my opinion, there needs to be more education about HSV in the gay community too. Finally, if you have HSV, you are not alone. The more I talk about it, the less shame I feel about it.

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Can you relate to this interviewee? Have you experienced something similar or do you have some feedback to share with this individual?

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Share your thoughts in the comments section below! For fun, Jenelle stays active as a group fitness instructor and also spends time camping, snow shoeing, hiking, skiing, kayaking, growing things, running through sprinklers, and building sand castles. First let me say: You may be misdiagnosing your self.



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I'm a straight woman, but I found herpes not to be a huge problem when dating. It made casual sex less frequent and a little less casual. I never felt that I had to only date other people with herpes though I would occasionally tell a guy I had herpes only to have him say, "Oh really? Me too! A few less than 5 guys balked and I never heard from them again but most did some research, asked me some questions and then we went on to have an awesome, healthy sexual relationship. It also helped me to remember that a guy choosing not to have sex with me because I had herpes wasn't a reflection on me or a rejection.

They were just making a choice and I think most of them just didn't like the idea of having to be SO careful all the time, something I could totally relate. You don't have to be disgusted with yourself. At worst you made a mistake, one which lots of people make, and maybe ended up with more far reaching consequences. Herpes certainly made me feel a little ashamed and self-conscious for awhile but it faded. I'd be happy to answer other questions if you want to memail me. Sorry this happened to you. Contracting any STI sucks. You have just an area of discoloration?

Definitely wait and talk to a doctor before you let this get you down. I went to get something checked out recently that I'd been convinced was somehow STI-related. Not only did that turn out NOT to be the case, the doctor was somewhat incredulous that something so minor would have led me to that conclusion, or to his office.



People overthink their junk. And with good reason I suppose, but honestly try to put it out of your mind until you know you have reason to worry.

Dating, Sex and Herpes

As a gay man who has HPV, let me reassure you that an incurable viral diagnosis will not spell the end to your dating life and will not require that you shuffle off to a convent to die a lonely celibate death. I remember the feeling that you're having now: I was mortified when I discovered the symptoms, and immediately told the guy I was seeing that I thought I might have HPV, though I assured him that in our fooling around he had not been near them and that he was probably okay. Rather than berate me for potentially putting him at risk, rather than telling all my friends that I was a skank, rather than avoiding me like the Typhoid Mary I presumed myself to be Whether we should continue seeing each other.

I was floored. HPV has changed my sexual practices somewhat, but it hasn't changed the regularity with which I have sex.